Will Schlickenmaier sent me an email the other day with an interesting proposition: what if a 2004 presidential candidate attacked Bush from the right? In particular, roast Dubya on farm subsidies. I didn't think this tactic would work, at least not unless it's part of some greater campaign strategy that covers more bases than subsidies. But it got me thinking.
Then today I read this excellent piece from the American Prospect. It talks about how the Democrats can prevent another Nader spoiler à la 2000 by completely destroying him and the Greens now. Any Democrats out there reading this? Combined with the Tony Blair effect, I believe hitting Nader fast and furious will give the Democrats the critical edge they need to win in '04.
As you can probably tell, I'm one of those royally pissed-off voters on the left who thinks Nader's a rat bastard for selling out Gore and leaving us with that idiot Bush.
UPDATE: Mike Tomansky isn't the only voice on the left urging Nader (and the Greens) not to fuck up 2004. More...More...
As early agribusinessmen and shipping magnates, the Founding Fathers wanted a strong central government to promote capitalism and prevent "mobocracy." Capitalist democracy comes full circle.
My parents just don't get it... Here I am working on an application for the only good job prospect I've got going in the last 2 months, and I'm getting lectured on how I'll never make money working for non-profits. Mom even got my uncle Y in Taiwan on her side. Dad already has M in Irvine agreeing with him on this too. As if money was the sole determinant of happiness. Well it's an important factor - no money = can't buy food, etc. - but there's also the feeling that I've helped someone in some way. And I don't see how working as a corporate tax attorney or somesuch will give me the same feeling of satisfaction as helping torture victims find asylum in the US. Or finding bright, energetic young people to go teach in poor inner-city schools, which is what I'd be doing if I got this job. J sez it's just an Asian parent thing... she gets the same from her dad. So I dunno... I wish they'd just lay off it and stop getting my extended relatives involved in it as well.
Something told me I should have gone to bed earlier... but talking with Di on IM about Hunter alumni connections seemed a bit more interesting than sleep...
Which reminds me - Jennifer Raab, President of the college, promised to mail this photo that was taken at graduation by one of the official PR photographers there but she never did. I found out from someone (J?) that it had appeared in The Word. Oh well.
J's gonna kill me for not going to bed early like I said I would...
Was talking to J earlier... in a way I think the fact that we don't see each other every day makes our time together more memorable. Still, just hearing her voice on the phone is not enough. I need to be back in New York.
On a side note, I caught most of an episode of MI5, a BBC import on the A&E network. Sort of like 24, with the domestic counter-terrorism premise but on the other side of the Atlantic and without the 24-hour real-time format. I think I can grow to like it. Except that the MI5 offices look like they came out of the IKEA catalog instead of, say, Herman Miller. Oh well, that's euro design for ya.
It's been nearly 2 months since graduation and I still haven't found a job. I've heard horror stories from Peyton about how she had to send over 100 resumes the summer after she graduated college. Or how my mom cried as she helped my dad type cover letters back when we were in Queens. Still, this is becoming ridiculous. And quite a bit discouraging. Somehow I can't shake the feeling that I'm just not good enough for any of these positions I'm applying for. That I've missed the boat while everyone around me was busy locking up job offers. That in the grand scheme of things, I'm a rank amateur with no business mixing with the pros.
Had a long talk with J about this, and I guess it helped calm my nerves down a bit. But now that she's started at UWNYC, it just sorta reinforces my own idleness... not that I have any hostility toward J's new internship. J suggested that I just need more time with friends... that I'm too isolated from everyone all the way out here in No. Bruns. I think she's right about that. I haven't hung out with any of the ACC since Orlando. I should call up the guys. Or maybe I should just get back to all the ISC work that's been piling up... just something to keep busy even if it's no longer as fulfilling as it used to be.
Also, 4 is unlucky in Chinese cuz it's pronunciation is a homophone for "dead," but now some guy from New Mexico thinks that 4 holds the secret of life.
I predicted on Inauguration Day, 2001, that as soon as Dubya becomes president we'd see a mass exodus to Canada. Well, I'm partially right. All together now, Blame Canada! Blame Canada!. Seriously though, I love Canada. It's like going to Europe without the whole trans-Atlantic thing.
I am sooooo tired... Yesterday was J's 21st birthday, so we had a night (and much of the afternoon) on the town. Went to St. Patrick's for a bit. I'm not big on religion, but I like the silence of big gothic churches. It's just soothing I guess... especially in the middle of Midtown. Then I took J down to Pearl River Mart to get her gift, which if I may say just makes her look even more beautiful.
Later it was dinner at Mama Mexico's and some partying at Calico Jack's. Mama Mexico's is always a good pick for a birthday... live music and tequila stands for all.
The seafood paella wasn't much to speak about but the guacamole was excellent. It's funny how J's been conspiring with Liz these past few weeks... like divine secrets of the polisci sisterhood... I officially have Liz's seal of approval. Yay!
Stayed at J's place last night cuz there was no way in hell I was making the last train back to NJ... Her room is as small and cluttered as she warned me about, but I don't care. I live amidst clutter myself and I thought it was rather cozy. I keep remembering this sign Mr. Schuster, who was probably the most disorganized man I have ever met, used to have over his desk at JP: "If a cluttered desk is the sign of a cluttered mind, what does that say about an empty desk?" At least her mom didn't seem to mind me staying over.
So I finally got back home around 1 in the afternoon today... And I would gladly do this all over again.
I ate a salad with eggs for lunch to make up for my lack of productive activity thus far today. But I had plenty of creamy Thousand Island dressing, and I kept the egg yolks! Lord, is this what modern man has been reduced to? Salad dressing as a form of rebellion? Erg..... I hate the health food craze.
UPDATE: OK I know I shouldn't freak out so easily about this... and in all honesty it should be a simple matter easily resolved between 3 rational adults. But I just don't understand what the hell my mom has against J. She's just been, I dunno, indifferent. Callous even. As if she has no idea of how important J is to me. If she doesn't want me having a girlfriend right now, then she should just say so. If she just plain doesn't like J, based on meeting her for all of 5 minutes back in May, then she should just say so. Does she not even realize how hurtful even a mindless remark can be? Forget all this "mother knows best" crap. I hate it when she's passive-aggressive like this. Why can't she talk to me about girlfriends and relationships like logical people? I dunno... I'm gonna try to talk some sense with my mom tonight and hopefully figure out why in hell she's treating my relationship with J like some kind of bad habit to be tolerated by sufferance. I need answers. J deserves better.
Also, Howard Dean may be in the spotlight as the 2004 Democratic presidential frontrunner, but I wouldn't mind if Bill Bradley gave it another run. Here's why.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrreat... I don't know whether J is going through a rough spot with her family, a rough spot with the journal, a rough spot with me, or all 3. I just had a pretty distressing conversation with her and it's not putting my mind at ease. Normally she'd jump at the chance to come visit me but not only did she say that she can't come this week but she doesn't want me going over there either. I hope it's just all the work she has to catch up on, but I've offered to help and she's said nothing. I can understand if she's still pissed about that thing from Sunday, but it seemed like she was over it and I don't know how much more I can apologize. She was ok yesterday morning, but last night she was just distant. So inconsistent with the way things have been going recently... I just hope things go back to normal by Friday. She deserves the best on her birthday and I want to be there with her.
I don't know how I could have fucked up in the relationship this early. Whether or not I did anything wrong, I'm gonna get blamed for this simply cuz by "The Rules" it's always the guy's fault in the relationship. So I'm gonna get pistol-whipped by basically all our mutual friends. Erg..... I wish I had more experience dealing with this kind of stuff. It's so different now that J is no longer just my friend but also my girlfriend. It's like I have to walk on eggshells again, and reestablish the comfort zone we had when we were just good friends. J can take care of herself, but I don't think I'm helping the situation at all... I feel powerless, useless, obtuse, and a little bit repulsive even to myself.
Well if she doesn't talk to me, there's really not much I can do... I hope this is just me over-reacting. I've never been with a girl that I care about as much as J. I'm madly in love with her and I pray she still feels the same way about me.
I usually don't blog about what's going on in my personal life, but I figure I probably should. One, at least I can get these random thoughts out of my system and two, nobody's probably reading this anyway.
It's funny how one day you're a student and the next day you're not. After 17 years, it's like there's a big blank space where September would normally be on the calendar. My graduation audit came in the mail a few days ago. Looks like my diploma will be approved, and I just gotta go to school to pick it up.
Living at home feels a little strange. My parents don't really bother me about when to go to bed or chores or anything like that. Still I think they're trying real hard to resist the temptation to treat me like I'm still in high school, you know - "take the garbage out," "vacuum the floor," "wash the dishes". I should probably help out more around the house seeing as how I'm living here rent free. I've just become so lazy (not like that's anything new). I could probably lose a few pounds doing housework, if my lazy fat ass ever gets around to it.
Y'see, I'm jobless. Just like the thousands of other recent graduates in this shitty economy. Yeah there's low level jobs that I could do, but I want something that'll look good for law school. Why did I ever not apply for this fall? I probably coulda got in to some decent schools... I can't stand myself sometimes when I have a clear goal, such as law school, and fail to follow through. I hate myself.
Well, at least I still got the ISC-ICC going for me, but I don't know for how much longer. I think I've ridden this horse about as far as I'm prepared to go, and I want to look for something else. The ICC in this country is hopeless as long as that dumbass Bush is president. Plus I'm not feeling as comfortable working with these people as I was just a few months ago. Maybe I just need a change of scenery, a new cause to get involved with, something to recharge my batteries. Maybe Professor Falk, who taught my International Law class, was right when she said that she quit being a human rights lawyer because it depressed her too much.
On a brighter note, though, I'm finally going out with someone after a 2 year drought in the love department! She's awesome. It's like she's got twice the energy that I do, packed into a body half my size. I just wish her mom would see her the way all her friends see her - as a smart, talented, and beautiful young woman. See, she goes home one day with a bit of a tan and the first thing her mom says to her is that she looks terrible because she's too dark. All together now, whaaaaa??? I can't imagine that kind of remark being appropriate in any situation. I hope she gets to talk to her mom like we discussed today, and talk some sense into her. Really, it's a week till she turns 21 but she's treated like she's 12. I really wish things will change for the better after she has a little heart to heart with her mom. I love you, JMGB. =)
Many top colleges that want to attract big donations and raise their rankings in US News have adopted the same tactics as corporate raiders and NFL scouts
